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Sunday, June 1, 2014

15 minutes about my quarter life crisis

Dennis and I have decided to start actively working on our "bucket list", which is a list of things you want to accomplish before you die. I'll share my list one day soon, (Done, click here to read it!) but one of the items on my list is to "have a thriving blog or write a book". Right now, I don't have time to pursue such silliness, but I would like to still be working toward that goal. I love to write, and I want to prioritize it, so I've challenged myself to write for fifteen minutes every day in the month of June. I'll write one post a day. Since I only have fifteen minutes to write, I'll be publishing my posts "as-is", with minimal proofreading and snazzing. Enjoy reading along if you like, but don't feel obligated.

Now, as for what inspired this new bucket list, it was this thing I once heard of called a quarter-life-crisis. You see, every time I have a new kid, I have a little identity crisis. Blame it on the hormones, and the lack of sleep. This time around, add in the fact that I got an invite to my ten year class reunion and I'm now entering my late twenties, and you've got a full blown quarter life crisis.

Stop laughing. Ok, you can laugh, I know it's silly. But wait until I tell you this next part - I also found my first gray hair this year. See, I told you it was a big deal. (don't miss the sarcasm there.) You see, I've always admired gray hair and said that I looked forward to seeing my hair turn steely and wise, but when it actually started happening, it was such a shocking moment. Not necessarily that my hair is changing color, but that my body is aging and I can't turn back the clock and I can't make it stop. Time will march on and there is nothing I can do about it. This scares me in every facet of my life, from my children growing up to my body falling apart to the inevitable final goodbye that we all have to say when our loved ones make that leap into the great beyond.

You see, when you are young you have every opportunity in front of you, but as life goes on and you put some of those major life decisions behind you, the pool of options begins to shrink. I've started to realize that my time on this earth is, in fact, limited and I may not actually have time to do it all. I'm also realizing that I'm not automatically going to become the person that I always wanted to be. It is going to take some intentional prioritizing and saying "yes" and "no" to the right things.

Let's not even start on the physical changes that come with aging. I always thought, as every young person does, I suppose, that I would age gracefully. You know, a few smile lines and gray hair. Other than that, nothing would sag or stretch or start to look elderly. Can I tell you that growing three kids in four years inside your body gives you a head start on the aging process? Those books I read on pregnancy and childbirth did not tell me to expect that.

Don't worry, I know I've still got a lot of good years ahead of me, Lord willing, and I know have the gumption to get focused and make the most of them.

Time's up!

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